I know I've been very "emo" in my posts, but today is a new day, a new post, and another start to trying to be more like Christ. today in Chapel we had a day of worship, and as I was singing, I starting to actually worship, break down, and call out to my Savior. This is the first time I've done this a while and doing so I realized something. I realized that I need a length of time to just be silent and be with God an extended bit of time. A time to just worship, confess, pray, and sit at his feet. The more I learn about myself the less I like who I am; I am needy, self-adsorbed, sinful, and some many other things; Yet God still loves me.
I look around at other believers around me, both older and younger in the faith, and see their hearts on fire for God, how I long for that. I have been churched to the point of being a hypocrite, I am a modern day Pharisee; I am a part of the modern synagogue, saying come to me for God and I'll tell to do X, Y, and Z and not A, B, and C while I am doing A, B, and C. I want to want to live out what I believe, I want to be the hands and feet of Christ.
Which reminds me of a quote a friend posted on Facebook today:
I know this is an over kill but it reminds us we are all sinners and cannot think ourselves better than those "tax collectors" and "Gentiles". We are just like them in the fact we are sinners; we just have been given God's Grace and we can impart share some with the tax collectors and gentiles in our life."If the church gets overrun with homosexuals, that would be terrific. They can take their place in the pews right next to the liars, gossips, and materialists."- Ed Dobson
Dear God,
Thank you so much for your love and mercy and how you love us even in our sin. May I be moving forward, moving towards you and not backtracking; moving from my old self and the Pharisee I was and am now. Please Lord fill me, use me, and allow me to be used to glorify you by doing your work.
Love,
Me
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